Bluebottle Jr.'s Profile - Rotten Tomatoes

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Rating History

The Return
The Return (2004)
5 years ago via Rotten Tomatoes
½

Sometimes you finally see something that was a real source of controversy 25 or 30 years ago and it loses a lot. Watching "Deep Throat" 20 years after the fact you wonder how it caused all the fuss it did, since there have been thousands of sexier and often better porn films since. "Pink Flamingos" stands the test of time. I just saw it for the first time and even though it's 33 yearsold, it's still every bit the sick, grotesque and demented outrage it ever was.

It became most famous for Divine eating dog shit at the end (which is just as gross as you'd imagine) but there's plenty of other jaw-dropping stuff, sex that involves two chickens being rubbed between the lovers' bodies, police being clubbed to death and eaten, the legendary Edie "The Egg Lady" Massey, baby-selling, cross-dressing, murder, contortionists. This puppy was one of a kind. The so-called outlaws today like Kevin Smith would never have the guts to make something this just plain wrong.
And I saw it on Starz On Demand cable! This movie has explicit sex scenes they wouldn't let the Playboy or Spice Channels get away with, but somehow "Pink Flamingos" has passed into the realm of "art" and it gets shown uncut. This was even a 25th Anniversary Edition that had John Waters showing deleted scenes at the end! Well I guess it isn't like anything a sane person would call a sex film. Something this bizarre yet focused has to be a work of art. There's nothing else to call it. This is the damnedst thing to come out of Baltimore since the work of Edgar Allen Poe.

Plain Dirty
Plain Dirty (2003)
8 years ago via Rotten Tomatoes
½

I've been going through what I hope to be permanent changes lately. This means my priorities have been different and I haven't been going out to rent movies, relying on whatever my cable system serves up. After a few weeks I've discovered that approach doesn't get it. There's some good stuff on cable but precious little of the really way out, bizarro films I enjoy. So I went to Video Americain today and lived up to my profile by getting two movies that have never even been released in this country, Larry Clark's "Ken Park" and Peter Greenaway's "The Baby Of Macon".

I saw a real whopper this morning, "Report To The Commissioner". I remember this film coming out with a lot of ballyhoo in the Seventies but nobody remembers it today, and with good reason, it's stupid. It's a bizarre story about undercover work gone horribly wrong and the resultant coverup, but there is a fatal flaw, the wog-boggling lead performance of Michael Moriarity who acts like a pre-Raphaelite flower child when he's supposed to be a rookie cop. It's ludicrous overacting and it's no wonder he spent several years doing Larry Cohen exploitation movies after this. The plot was strange in a couple of ways as well but a better lead actor and director might have worked out of it all. Instead we get two ludicrous chase scenes as padding, one with Moriarity chasing a black guy in boxer shorts over rooftops and one of a legless street beggar careening through Manhattan like a skateboarder!
Some good actors here despite all that, Yaphet Kotto, Hector Elizondo, Vic Tayback, William Devane and Richard Gere as a pimp (!). There's an oddconnection knowing that twenty years later Moriarity and Kotto would be working in two excellent TV cop shows, Moriarity inder control as prosecuting attorney Ben Stone in "Law And Order" and Kotto as LT Giardella on "Homicide: Life On The Street".

Ju-on 2 (Ju-on: The Grudge 2)
12 years ago via Rotten Tomatoes

...and I've got some catching up to do. I've seen my usual assortment of WTF movies over the past week. "Pulse", which I saw on cable under the name "Octane", was a strange thriller about a single mother whose teenage daughter gets picked up by a vampiric cult while driving on the highway. The mother tries to get her back with the help of a trucker whose sister fell victim to the same cult. There is nice atmosphere in this but the camera is dizzly hyperactive and the entire thing seems creepier than it needs to be. The best thing about it is Madeline Stowe playing the mother. She is stone cold gorgeous, another beautiful, mature actress who can't get a look in from the blind, deaf and dumb slugs that run A-List Hollywood.

I had heard vague but good things about "I'm Not Scared" and they were justified. This is an Italian thriller about a young boy in a rural village who discovers a boy chained up in a hole, eventually stumbling onto a kidnapping plot that involves his entire town, including his parents. This was good stuff, the acting, the suspense, everything worked here. I'm amazed more people haven't discovered this film. There would have been plenty of raves about it if they had.

Speaking of suspense I saw the original Japanese version of the film "Ju-On: The Grudge" and it was well done but after seeing both versions of "The Ring" it had an air of been there, done that. You can only see so many crawling female ghosts before the bit gets old. Judging from this and other recent Japanese horror films I've heard about that country seems to be as hung up on revenge-seeking ghosts as our horror movies used to be on teen-killing psychos.

I'd never seen one of Claude Lelouch's films before but I'd heard they weren't so hot, mostly cloying romances that just went on too long for no good reason. I wanted to see his "And Now Ladies And Gentlemen" because I was interested in the female lead, Patricia Kaas, a French cabaret singer I like. She was beautiful and a pretty good actress but the film lived down to Lelouch's reputation, a romance involving a jewel thief and a lounge singer that was just too slow, too contrived and too bloody long. A story about two people supposedly dying from brain tumors should have been enough but he had to throw in some goofy bull about a jewel robbery that drew out the thing beyond endurance.

But talk about endurance...Hoo boy! I couldn't believe what I endured in sitting through something called "Slaves Of The Realm" last night. I didn't expect much because the lead actress was Rena Mero, better known as Sable, former WWE ring decoration and bitchy showpiece. She played a high priestess in some kind of sword and sorcery tale about beautiful young noblewomen captured and made to work in a silver mine by an evil princess who is also trying to hook up her brother, the King, with one of them to produce an heir.
This thing was shot on video in the Czech Republic and is full of beautiful Czech actresses dressed either in revealing sheaths or black leather bondage duds, no bad thing in itself but bizarrely, the movie isn't the sort of sexed up softcore Seduction Cinema sort of piece you would expect. There is a little nudity, but not nearly as much as the situation suggests and no real sex scenes. Insanely the story is played straight, this despite its obviously miniscule budget and bottom drawer acting. Worst of all it's incredibly padded with every action and plot point repeated over and over. There is endless footage of the captives working in the mines and the villainess has six (!) practice swordfights shown in full before she has the climatic one with Mero. Supposedly this bomb was only 99 minutes but I swear it felt like two hours. I wasn't that thrilled about the Super Bowl but I can't believe I missed most of it to watch this dog.

Octane (Pulse)
12 years ago via Rotten Tomatoes

...and I've got some catching up to do. I've seen my usual assortment of WTF movies over the past week. "Pulse", which I saw on cable under the name "Octane", was a strange thriller about a single mother whose teenage daughter gets picked up by a vampiric cult while driving on the highway. The mother tries to get her back with the help of a trucker whose sister fell victim to the same cult. There is nice atmosphere in this but the camera is dizzly hyperactive and the entire thing seems creepier than it needs to be. The best thing about it is Madeline Stowe playing the mother. She is stone cold gorgeous, another beautiful, mature actress who can't get a look in from the blind, deaf and dumb slugs that run A-List Hollywood.

I had heard vague but good things about "I'm Not Scared" and they were justified. This is an Italian thriller about a young boy in a rural village who discovers a boy chained up in a hole, eventually stumbling onto a kidnapping plot that involves his entire town, including his parents. This was good stuff, the acting, the suspense, everything worked here. I'm amazed more people haven't discovered this film. There would have been plenty of raves about it if they had.

Speaking of suspense I saw the original Japanese version of the film "Ju-On: The Grudge" and it was well done but after seeing both versions of "The Ring" it had an air of been there, done that. You can only see so many crawling female ghosts before the bit gets old. Judging from this and other recent Japanese horror films I've heard about that country seems to be as hung up on revenge-seeking ghosts as our horror movies used to be on teen-killing psychos.

I'd never seen one of Claude Lelouch's films before but I'd heard they weren't so hot, mostly cloying romances that just went on too long for no good reason. I wanted to see his "And Now Ladies And Gentlemen" because I was interested in the female lead, Patricia Kaas, a French cabaret singer I like. She was beautiful and a pretty good actress but the film lived down to Lelouch's reputation, a romance involving a jewel thief and a lounge singer that was just too slow, too contrived and too bloody long. A story about two people supposedly dying from brain tumors should have been enough but he had to throw in some goofy bull about a jewel robbery that drew out the thing beyond endurance.

But talk about endurance...Hoo boy! I couldn't believe what I endured in sitting through something called "Slaves Of The Realm" last night. I didn't expect much because the lead actress was Rena Mero, better known as Sable, former WWE ring decoration and bitchy showpiece. She played a high priestess in some kind of sword and sorcery tale about beautiful young noblewomen captured and made to work in a silver mine by an evil princess who is also trying to hook up her brother, the King, with one of them to produce an heir.
This thing was shot on video in the Czech Republic and is full of beautiful Czech actresses dressed either in revealing sheaths or black leather bondage duds, no bad thing in itself but bizarrely, the movie isn't the sort of sexed up softcore Seduction Cinema sort of piece you would expect. There is a little nudity, but not nearly as much as the situation suggests and no real sex scenes. Insanely the story is played straight, this despite its obviously miniscule budget and bottom drawer acting. Worst of all it's incredibly padded with every action and plot point repeated over and over. There is endless footage of the captives working in the mines and the villainess has six (!) practice swordfights shown in full before she has the climatic one with Mero. Supposedly this bomb was only 99 minutes but I swear it felt like two hours. I wasn't that thrilled about the Super Bowl but I can't believe I missed most of it to watch this dog.